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Acquisitions, Inc. PAX West 2017
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Acquisitions, Inc. PAX West 2017
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==== The Dinosaur Race ==== Another rider tells [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] to prepare to be annihilated. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] summons a dove and tries to have it shit on her. He rolls a natural one. It hits [[Omin Dran|Omin]] instead. Time to stick the roids up the dinosaur's butt. What kind of check? Sleight of hand. [[Viari]] makes his roll. Wait.. he doesn't want to do it. Rolls a 4! He has a +13. 17! Crowd goes nuts. [[Viari]] gets caught in the "contractions". His arm is stuck deep in the butt of their triceratops. [[Chris Perkins|Chris]] goes over the rules: * Don't go down side streets. * No attacking the other riders (It's fair game if nobody sees it). * A triceratops costs 500 gp. * The race is abstract. It is based on a point system. The first person to get 300 points wins. * The race involves animal handling checks. * The DC to succeed is different depending on what dinosaur you're riding. An allosaurus is more difficult than a triceratops, because an allosaurus is hard to control. * You can whip your beast to make it go faster. If it doesn't like it, though, it might do something. The race begins! [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] is riding his triceratops. [[Viari]]'s arm is actually stuck in its butt. He makes a check to escape... 3. He's getting sucked in. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] needs a 14 on his check to succeed. He has 50 points so far. [[Viari]] makes his check. His arm is free. [[Strix]] is on her flying broom and grabs him. Paper chandeliers just so happen to be stretched across the street. [[Viari]] swings from paper chandelier to paper chandelier. Each comes apart as he goes to the next one. He lands on Banana Candy. The rider starts smacking him with his whip. [[Viari]] picks his pocket. He snatches a dinosaur hide pouch from his pocket. He goes "Is this yours"? He hands it over and "accidentally" drops it, trying to get the rider to fall off. [[Omin Dran|Omin]] is among the spectators. He's being followed by two tabaxis. One has pantaloons, the other is wearing a hat. [[Omin Dran|Omin]] walks up to them and tells them if they want to follow a cleric of luck, they'll have to do better. One cracks its lute over [[Omin Dran|Omin]]'s head. One point of damage. The cat guy runs. [[Omin Dran|Omin]] cracks him in the head with his mace with an opportunity attack. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] is rolling really well. The juice kicks in. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] now has 100 points. Now 250. 50 more and [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] wins. Ubtao's Favorite and Banana Candy are ahead of him. [[Viari]] is on Banana Candy. The dinosaurs collide and they both topple over. [[Viari]] wants to leap and save the snake woman, the same from the library. [[Viari]] tosses her toward some fruit stand. [[Strix]] flies over and redirects her toward a statue of a tiger. Rolls a 10. Now she needs a DEX save. [[Strix]] misses and the snake woman on an awning. [[Strix]] crashes through a window of an estate. She's going through hallways. Survival check to navigate. 20 total. [[Strix]] exits, leaving a burnt hole in her shape in the drapes. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] is winning the race! He rolls bad. His dinosaur is becoming uncontrollable. He's running down the sidewalk smashing into things. A kid on a balcony throws a melon at him. The kid rolls a natural 20. It covers [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]]'s head. He can't see anything. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] rolls to navigate blind. 18 total. Crowd chants "18". Oh yeah... that's the number of the dinosaur. Only one dinosaur, named Big Honker, is ahead of him. [[Strix]] ''misty steps'' onto [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]]'s dinosaur and is going to try to steer it. Her broom starts whacking Big Honker in the face. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] blows past Big Honker. The crowd chants "18". [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] pulls the melon off his head. [[Strix]] declares that she wins. [[Jim Darkmagic|Jim]] is choking her. She turns into a cloud.
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